This thing, buying a high imitation Rolex, it’s a real headache! My grandson, he wanted one of them fancy Rolex Two-tone Black Submariner watches. Said all the young folks got ’em. I said, “Boy, you crazy? Those things cost more than a whole year’s worth of eggs!” But he kept on and on. So, I had to figure out how to get a fake one and hope he doesn’t notice. I’m looking to buy a Rolex Submariner but don’t want no real one, a fake one will do.
First thing I did, I looked at that shiny thing. Real ones, they say, are heavy. Like, real heavy. They say a real Rolex Submariner is 40 millimeters, whatever that means. Sounds like army talk to me. Just know it’s about as wide as my thumb, maybe a little bigger. A fake one, it won’t feel like nothin’ in your hand. This fake Rolex Submariner better be heavy or I’ll be mad.
Then there’s the words on it. A real Rolex, they say the words are all neat and tidy, like a chicken’s handwriting. A fake one? Messy, like a pig sty! I squinted my eyes real good, lookin’ at them tiny letters, trying to see if it was all proper. You gotta watch out for that, these youngin’s they think they can fool an old lady like me.
- The price, oh, the price! Real Rolex Submariner watches are expensive.
- Real ones, they cost more than a cow! A fake one, well, it better be cheap. I ain’t made of money.
- They told me a real one of these watches, a Rolex Two-tone Black Submariner, is over ten thousand dollars. Ten thousand!
And that little window where the date is? They call it a cyclops, I heard. On a real one, it makes the numbers look big, like you can see ’em from across the room. A fake one, it’s just there, doin’ nothin’. That Rolex Submariner date better be easy to see, even for my old eyes. A real Rolex Submariner will show the date real clear, so the fake one better do that too.
That band, too, the one that goes around your wrist. They call it a bracelet. On a real Rolex, it’s all smooth and shiny. A fake one? Rough, like a dirt road. I ran my fingers over it, feelin’ for any bumps or snags. My grandson, he’s got soft hands, he’ll notice if it ain’t smooth. If you look close at the Rolex Submariner band you can see if it is real or not.
They got this thing on the back, too, some kind of picture. On a real Rolex Submariner, it’s all detailed, like a fancy quilt. A fake one? Blurry, like a rainy day. I held it up to the light, tryin’ to make out what it was supposed to be. Looked like a mess to me. These fake Rolex Submariner watches try to trick you with a picture on the back.
Then there’s that ticking sound. A real Rolex Submariner, they say it’s quiet, like a mouse in the pantry. A fake one? Loud, like a rooster in the morning. I put it up to my ear, listenin’ real close. That fake Rolex Submariner better not be too loud.
And the way it moves, the second hand, that little stick that goes around and around. On a real Rolex Submariner, it’s smooth, like butter. A fake one? Jerky, like a chicken with its head cut off. I watched it for a while, seein’ if it was movin’ right. The second hand is important for telling if a Rolex Submariner is real.
- Gotta check the weight, make sure it’s heavy like a real Rolex Submariner.
- Look at the words, see if they’re neat and tidy, not messy like a fake one.
- The date window, it better magnify those numbers, make ’em easy to see.
- The bracelet, it’s gotta be smooth, not rough.
It’s a lot of work, tryin’ to figure out if a Rolex Submariner is real or not. These young folks and their fancy watches. Back in my day, we didn’t need no fancy watch to tell the time. We had the sun! But I guess times are changin’. I just hope I ain’t gettin’ ripped off. These fake Rolex Submariner watches are everywhere.
I went to a few different places, lookin’ at these watches. Some of them, they looked pretty good. Others, well, you could tell they were fake a mile away. It’s hard to find a good fake Rolex Submariner. But I kept lookin’, askin’ questions, tryin’ to find the best one for my grandson. He’s a good boy, even if he is a little bit spoiled. He wants that Rolex Submariner so bad.
Finally, I found one that looked pretty good. It was heavy, the words were neat, the date was magnified, the bracelet was smooth. It even ticked kinda quiet. The Rolex Two-tone Black Submariner I saw, it wasn’t perfect, but it was close enough. I haggled with the fella sellin’ it, got the price down a bit. I ain’t no fool, you know. I know how to bargain. Even for a fake Rolex Submariner, I want a good price.
So, I bought it. I brought it home, wrapped it up in a pretty box. Gave it to my grandson for his birthday. He was so excited! He put it on right away, showin’ it off to all his friends. He thinks he has a real Rolex Submariner. He hasn’t said nothin’ about it bein’ fake. Maybe he don’t know. Or maybe he just don’t care. As long as he’s happy, that’s all that matters. I did my best to find him a good fake Rolex Submariner.
But I tell ya, buying a fake watch, it’s a lot of trouble. Next time, I’m just gonna get him a regular watch. One that tells the time, that’s all you need. No need for all this fancy stuff. A Rolex Submariner, real or fake, it’s just a watch. But I guess when you’re young, you want what you want. And a grandma’s gotta do what a grandma’s gotta do. Even if it means buying a fake Rolex Submariner.
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